Dear Baby Boy,
It’s hard to imagine that one day, you, little baby wriggling in my tummy, will be able to read these words. Pregnancy and impending motherhood has made me reflect so much on my own life and what I want to pass on to you, little boy. I’m sure this list can be infinitely added to, but for now on a cold lunchtime in January …. 20 pearls of wisdom from Momma …
1. This is it. From the moment you arrive into this crazy and wonderful world, you have one life. And it goes pretty quickly. LIVE IT, appreciate it, even the bad times, because nothing stays the same, and beauty can be found in the darkest of moments.
2. You don’t have to understand everything; no one does.
3. Face your fears. I used to be terrified of flying, yet clocked up thousands of miles going backwards and forwards to India and elsewhere. I admit, Gin & Tonic helped, as did the odd Valium – but my desire to travel and see the world was greater than a fear of being trapped in a heavy metal object with a bunch of strangers defying gravity. It’s good to do things which scare you. Be bold.
4. Don’t be squeezed into a pigeon hole because society/stereotype pushes you towards it. Know that as your mother, I want you to be fully who YOU are and who YOU want to be. Whatever that is, is immaterial … just do it to the best of your ability.
5. Be kind. It’s not always easy, there are times people annoy us and drive us mad, and make us become unreasonable and grouchy – but kindness is always the better option. This doesn’t mean you’re a pushover, and I have no qualms about you throwing a punch or two for a good reason …
6. Talk to me; I’m pretty unshockable; and I’ll always have time to listen – no matter what, the old cliché about a problem shared is true …
7. Laugh a lot – there is nothing like a good belly laugh; and there is ALWAYS something to giggle at … happiness is contagious …
8. Keep up to date with the news; the world is a big place, and your boring old mother thinks it’s a good idea to know what’s happening in it. At least buy a Sunday newspaper, or watch the 6 o’clock news.
9. Travel when you can. See as much of this crazy world as possible; meet different people on your travels; enter their worlds and allow them to enter yours.
10. Take risks; they may not always work out, but it’s better to follow your dreams and give it a go …. I believe we regret the things we don’t do more than those we tried at and didn’t succeed.
11. Read books
12. The biggest lesson I’ve learnt in life so far is one of balance and moderation. Have fun learning this lesson yourself; whether it be overindulgence in alcohol, overspending, overeating, undereating, over exercising … etc.etc! Ultimatley, I’ve decided the middle ground sometimes has its benefits.
13. People watching is a wonderful activity, whether it be in coffee shops, public transport, or even at work. People are interesting; watch them.
14. Not everyone will like you. This is okay. I will.
15. Admit your mistakes, humble pie is a cake we all need to eat at some points in life.
16. Giving someone your time and undivided attention is worth much more than money …
17. Be passionate about things which matter to you. Go on protests; don’t be afraid to speak up for what you believe in.
18. No one knows what happens when we die … but make sure you live a life you can be at peace with when the time comes. Make amends, keep friends, accept and forgive yourself as well as others.
19. Wash regularly.
20. Always know that you are loved, and have been from the day the cross appeared on the pregnancy test – however much of a surprise this was!