Warning graphic feminine content

It has been 5 days since little Fredders entered the world, and yet I can no longer remember a life without him in it. People say there is no love like the love of a mother … but until you have your precious warm squishy bundle in your arms, you cannot comprehend it. Your purpose in life is suddenly gravitated around the little piece of perfection you grew in your womb. Observations from a 5 days post partum momma [no stigmas barred]

1. After spending a great deal of time whilst in the birthing pool declaring that I was going to poo and that it felt like Freddie was coming out of the wrong hole, one of my biggest fears post delivery was the inevitable first poo. I’m relieved to report that my insides didn’t fall out when it happened …

2. People don’t really talk much about bleeding after childbirth; in fact I was quite horrified at the one birthing class when it was suggested we buy maternity pads. Why? I’d asked innocently. Oh boy, now I know. I had a mild panic attack at what seemed to be an enormous piece of womb which emerged one day, and yet was reassured that practically, to quote a friend, if it isn’t as large as your fist, you’ll be okay. The human body really IS incredible [still alive]

3. Your breasts suddenly inflate within a matter of hours on the day your milk comes in. Woah. I mean, seriously! When people said I may leak a little bit, I imagined the odd drop – not to be walking around as if I’d poured a pint down my pyjama top. That said, breast feeding is THE best feeling, so I can totally deal with the sore nips. Natural coconut oil is proving a god send …

4. Throughout my pregnancy I craved steak and glasses of cold milk. I can’t bear the thought of either one now …

5. Not getting round to cleaning your teeth until 3pm is totally acceptable

6. Little boys willies have a good spray on them, especially when changing a nappy!! Poor Fredders got himself in the eye one day, and my glasses got a good spray the next!


Talking of which, Master Freddie is stirring, so it must be time for some boob-juice. More snippets soon ….


One thought on “Warning graphic feminine content

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